Monday, January 22, 2007
the fly
CBB5 Day Eighteen
Twenty years ago, Jeff Goldblum starred in the movie, 'The Fly', in which he played Seth Brundle, a loopy scientist who teleports himself hither and thither, and due to an accidental fusion with a housefly, ends up undergoing some rather grim adventures.
If there is ever a danger of a re-make, I have the natural successor to Goldblum for the role...
Step into the spotlight please, Ms Shilpa Shetty. With her penchant for wearing monster 'Jackie Onassis' shades for most of her waking hours, Ms Shetty unfortunately bears the appearance of a (very pretty) human insect. Beware, if Shilpa ever invites you to join her in her telepod.
Whether it has become a conscious decision for several housemates to follow Jermaine's lead in BB fashion to wear shades, indoors, in the middle of winter, is open to conjecture, but it is sure having an impact on non-verbal communication.
However, Cleo more than compensated for this, with her, frankly, rather weird decision to unaccountably audition for a role in some sort of fourth division Catherine Tate style characterisation.
This was an awful, awful, moment of embarrassing television. With Dirk hating every second of the 'joke', Cleo followed the poor fellow around, imposing this dreadful piece of kindergarten acting onto Dirk in a cringingly physical manner.
Dirk seems to be a very morose man. Life appears to be something of a trial for him, and his grumpy view of the world was not improved by this peculiar and grotesque incident.
Unaware of the whole bullying furore outside the House (or at least the depth of it), it is sad indeed to see the inmates now simply moving on from Shilpa to Dirk as the focus of their 'Lord Of The Flies' target, with Cleo, unaccountably as the replacement leader following Jade's departure.
Quite why Cleo has transformed herself overnight from the 'voice of common sense' to this dreadful, baying, hellcat is impossible to answer, unless, whilst we slept, Shilpa dragged her into a 'Fly' teleport, and fused her with Jackiey, and Tubbs from The League of Gentlemen.
So we have Cleo in the diary room, noting that Dirk "could crack... we can play on that."
Inevitably, Jo is clamouring to join in, and after telling us about her previously unknown second hobby - this time, stealing from restaurant bathrooms - she said that Dirk's mood of gloom would make her want to, "do it more... I want to see him crack".
Cleo responded that they must take the "road where we aren't to blame. It will crack anyway. It might just take a day or two longer."
Ain't humanity a wonderful thing? And do you know the worst of it? The very worst thing?
Shilpa was joining in.
remotevision@gmail.com
# posted by Terence : 8:10 PM
